rage on - choosing priorities
POSTED ON: Friday, December 4, 2009 @ 3:29 PM | 0 comments
hello everyonealright. currently addicted to How do I live Without You. Read the lyrics of the song and I guess that it's really meaningful you know. I mean, yeahs, how can i continue to survive without all the wonderful people who are always there for me. my family, my 'sisters'. they're the best. chance upon this song while i was reading that novel.
and my cramps are like killing me now. like gosh. this is the worst cramp that i've ever had for ages. wonder what works to cure it this time.
anyway, watch this drama in the morning. Its about this guy and this girl. Friends who develop feelings for each other. So yeahs, that guy's a lawyer (AHH! Hotness!) and the girl is a librarian. They were close friends until that guy is supposedly convicted for some money laundering activities. which is not even true cos his friend 'framed' him. that guy left the girl cos he doesn't want her to be involved in what he went through. ended up, that guy somehow met up with that girls' sister and they got married.
gosh, can you imagine that? i mean, that guy marry that girls' sister! my heart longs to the girl. i wouldn't even know how to face myself if a person i like is being like by someone else who's close to me as well. I am like so sad for her. Haha. Too sad that i started crying even. I can totally understand how she felt. At last, she sacrifice for the happiness of everyone. Haha. I am crying again now. Sad.
I realise that i've dissapoint a lot of people this year. Somehow, dissappointing others actually tells me that I am dissappointed in myself also. How long am i going to be like this? How long am I willing to see all the people who loves me getting unhappy at how certain things are going on for me? I've done a lot of mistakes this year. Too many that i can even count in fact. I guess, there's alot of sacrifices that they have done for me. Alot. Tegarkah aku melukakan hati insan-insan yang aku sayangi hanya kerana 'hiburan-hiburan' yang tidak kekal yang aku reka sendiri? Cukuplah. I need to start afresh. I want to start afresh. They have done what they could for me so i believe that now is the time for me to put in my part as well. It takes 2 hands to clap right? So, i am going to make this work.
Daddy tells me:
" Letakkan harga dirimu di tempat yang tertinggi. Peliharalah dirimu. Jadilah seperti wanita di dalam bekas kaca, mudah mesra namun sukar didekati. Hanya yang benar-benar kuat barulah akan dapat mendekatinya bak jinak-jinak merpati..."
with loves
Blogging to express, not to impress.
